3-Minute "No" Practice

Time needed: 3 minutes (60 seconds each)

Setting: Before responding to requests or when feeling overwhelmed

Purpose: Developing clear, kind boundaries through practiced refusal

Inner Permission (60 seconds)

What: Place one hand on chest, take three breaths. Silently repeat:

- "I have the right to say no"

- "My time and energy are valuable"

- "Saying no to this means saying yes to my needs"

Notice: Physical sensations that arise, any guilt or resistance, where you feel tension or release

Why: Establishes internal foundation for external boundaries, reduces people-pleasing impulse, validates your needs

Response Rehearsal (60 seconds)

What: Choose a current request you want to decline. Practice phrases like:

- "I need to pass on this opportunity"

- "I don't have capacity for this right now"

- "This doesn't fit my priorities at the moment"

- "I've decided to focus elsewhere"

Notice: Which phrasing feels authentic, what tone conveys respect, how brief clarity feels

Why: Builds refusal vocabulary, reduces over-explanation, strengthens boundary muscle

No With Integrity (60 seconds)

What: For your chosen situation, consider:

- Whether a clear "no" or "no, but..." serves best

- What timing would be most respectful

- One sentence that honestly explains your limit

- How to close the interaction positively

Notice: What feels both kind and firm, your growing clarity, reduced need to justify

Why: Aligns boundaries with values, maintains relationships, models healthy limits

Closing: One breath with "My no creates space for what matters"

Notice: Sense of reclaimed agency and energy

Why: Reframes "no" as positive choice rather than rejection

Tips:

- Start with smaller "no" situations

- Avoid over-explaining or apologizing

- Practice brevity and clarity

- Honor discomfort as part of growth

- Remember that good boundaries create better relationships

- Your "no" gives others permission for theirs​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​